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Jun 9, 2004
Wassup People I really Thank God for the time he had place me on this earth it has it's up and downs but I seem to always make it thru them. I have people thinking I am obess and crazy just because I open my mouth to a confession of my thoughts, What they don't understand is that even I am scare of the thought of taking my life or Lovin someone so hard to the point of them to even see me that way I do understand negative gives negative so I apologize for my burdens to be on the shoulders of someone I love and someone I call my dawg. I was ask on tonight that if I was to past would people cry for a day or 2 and move on with their life or would they care at all. Some question huh
I am to meet someone who have been giving me drama and not sure what it may bring but at least I can say I handle it. I don't want anyone to get hurt or be stress over my situation, I am not a person to do any harm and I am not a person of drama so I will end this situation the best way I know how. They promise that all they want to do is talk but I am no fool. I will handle it carefully as I can but all I know is I don't want anyone to get hurt cause of me. I have been accuse of alot of things just last night I was accuse of something I had no dealing with not sure why someone who don't even know me would lie on me but I will handle that as well.
I talk with my grandparents tonight my grandmother is 92 and my granddad is 89 and both of them is not doing too good right now I almost lost my grandmother 3 days ago and nobody told me until I talk to her tonight and she told me herself. My grandmother is my best friend really we keep each other laughting when we talk she told me tonight that she love talking to me I always keep her going. She have taught me alot of about wisdom. My grandparents is the one who I am grateful too they have taught me alot of things and they have so much wisdom to share.
Ebonyeyes (femintellect) I love you too thank you for commenting to my diary. If I depart from this earth I have always love you from the day we connected and having the chance to spend time and know you all over again I apprecicate you more than you will know. Thank you for being here for me I will not take you for granted as I have in the past but I will cherish every moment with you. I see now more than just for a day i see more ahead for me and it is great to know you will be right by my side to share it with. Everyday will not be sunshine but it will not be Rain either. Posted at 11:07 pm by crazytongue
Jun 7, 2004
Well taking a drive looking at the sites as I passes by the land the oceans the people just thinking how life is I take it as a big cirlcle and thinking should I just look at life as simple as I breath the air or drink water take it as it come and say well that's Just life. I guess if I do then life would be so easy to handle but yet is that satisfying to me or could it be better now I know life is what we make so if I want to be happy I guess I got to make it that way. I have two people to Thank Nicki you are a good person thank you and know I am taking you up on your offer cause I am here.
CarNesha Thank you for the 2hrs and all the comfort and love you giving me. I am trying as I know people read the diary so not much will be exposed and I guess your 20mins will arrive sometime soon but until then I guess Lauryn Hill will have to do. Much Love and Appreciation to all of you Affection, Admiration and Respect. Thank You for being here Ebonyeyez
I am here now but if I ever should leave just know I will always be around in spirit. Posted at 10:20 pm by crazytongue
May 31, 2004
Just Another Day Alone
Wassup I got up this morning wondering what was today going to bring it seem like everyday there is something new going on or happening. I was thinking how I wake up with no one next to me and lay down with no one next to me. I look at how I was going down with my life no money, no job, and everything was just going wrong, now I wake up to a beautiful day cause that is how I make it I wear a smile even when I should be frowning I try hard to not get down even when my heart is aching, I look at it how I rearrange my feelings to be just a little stronger than they was, cause I knew I was a women get old when I all I did was cry. I have feelings I can understand that but I try to keep them from being so sensitive and take a person for who they are. That is how I handle my job and family. I mean 27 years of age and mom still trying to control me and really society controls me too cause my life is being an example for little kids when I accept the challenge to become someone positive in my life I accept the role model part as well. I am so please to know that I am not a thug or crazy women out there just doing anything with my life and how I wish to be back in school to finish my degree I understand I have to take my life one step at a time but at least i know I have a goal and future ahead of me. Now to answer the question that was ask to me do I see myself as a Role Model no I don't but I do care about the things in this world and I care about life mines or anyone else and if I can help of anyone see that life can be beautiful if we make it. It's about independence of controllling yourself and recongizing your flaws and treating other how you would like to be treated just know Nobody is perfect cause we all have flaws that is why you love a person for who they are and help a person with their flaws. Well I guess I go now Posted at 06:26 pm by crazytongue
May 29, 2004
I Said I wouldn't Fall in Love Again
I Said I wouldn't Fall in Love Again One to many time my hearts been crumble on the floor
So I had to live without it, I'm tired crying about it
After awhile I did miss it anymore, I got a custom to the quiet
Didn't have the strength to fight it
And when you smile something stir inside of me
And I can't break thru my insecurities
Say I wouldn't , Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't baby, Say I wouldn't fall in love again
Say I wouldn't , Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't baby, Say I wouldn't fall in love again
Say I wouldn't , Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't baby, Say I wouldn't fall in love again
I said it Oh Yeah, I Said wouldn't fall in love again
You open up apart me that I thought had disapper
Should I surrender to your power, and run deep into this fire
I want to be your crazy thing to be tied up in again
Would you promise to be waiting, when this soul of mines is fading
It's hard for me to believe this thing is real and if all your words are true
but yet my heart still needs time to heal
Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't baby, Say I wouldn't fall in love again
Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't baby, Say I wouldn't fall in love again
Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't, Say I wouldn't baby, Say I wouldn't fall in love again
I Said it Oh Yeah I Say wouldn't fall in love again
This crazy feeling within and I say I wouldn't fall in love again
Oh Yeah I say I wouldn't fall in love again but I was Wrong
Posted at 05:54 am by crazytongue
May 28, 2004
Sitting here think just how much I am missing Home, Virgina
I miss the waken up in the morning to the smell of city air
the train running on the tracks, hearing the buses as they run
I miss Graby Park, Tidewater Park, Waterside, St Paul Ave, Norflok State and etc.
I miss everything about home I miss sitting outside talking with my family and friends
I miss taking walks to 7eleven and going to the scope I miss so much about home.
I miss talking with my brothers and we going shopping on military Hwy
I miss going to the beach and on the base,
I miss the smell of the shipping yard
I miss staying with my cousin so we could go and party
I miss so much about my home. Posted at 03:18 pm by crazytongue
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